Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Final Essay

April 29, 2014

Who I Am

I am a fairly average person. When presented with this opportunity to write our final essay with the topic being “the story of my body” I felt I was doomed from the start. Other people knew immediately what the focus of their essay was, but I was stuck. I hadn’t had any profound experiences that I could remember; my parents are still together after thirty-two years of marriage, I lost my grandparents on my dad’s side two years ago, but other than that haven’t experienced death of loved one’s, I haven’t studied abroad, and I go to college and hour and a half away from my home. At first I was frustrated with that being the case, but soon realized how silly that was and felt extremely blessed for how fairly average my life is. I was born into opportunities that I didn’t have to work for and my somewhat sheltered life prevented me from traumatic experiences. It wasn’t only what I have experienced, but also my appearances. I graduated from Upper Arlington, a suburb outside of Columbus, Ohio (where I have lived my entire life), I’m white, middle-class, stand about 5’4, have brown hair and brown eyes. I would say I am pretty standard looking, no exotic or definitive features.

In a ready titled “The Story of My Body”, Judith Ortiz Cofer reflects on her skin color and other features shaped her identity. She discusses her Puerto Rican heritage and what it meant to have brown skin in the United States. This creates a very engaging story. It presented a perspective that was different from my own body. To me, it seemed as though writing the story of your body meant you had to stand out from others in order to have a story to tell. You had to be different in a way that affected your outcome in a different way from others. I realized soon that this was an ignorant way to think. Every person experiences life in a unique way and that every person has a story to tell. I began to think that being in the majority average has affected me in ways that I wasn’t aware of. Also, it isn’t only about the color of a person’s skin, their ethnicity or heritage background that makes people unique from others.  

It’s easy to see how finding a definitive experience that has shaped my identity may be somewhat challenging. I found it difficult to find one specific thing that has contributed to shaping the person that I am today. Instead, I came to realize that it was several different small experiences (or lack there of) that have done so. To me, this concept of being fairly average has shaped my development and my identity as it is today. This could be for many reasons. First, it has provided me with opportunities that may not have been present if circumstances were different. If I hadn’t been born into a middle-class family with parents who knew the importance of an education, I may not have been able to attend college. Even if that college is in state and an hour plus away from my home, it’s still an opportunity I was blessed with that so many others aren’t. By being away from home at college for three years now I have learned how valuable it is. My high school graduates students with about a ninety-nine percent college bound rate. Almost every person who graduates goes on to pursue a college education. What I came to realize after high school, which sounds completely ignorant, is that this isn’t the case everywhere. To some, a college education isn’t even in the cards. My averageness was all about perspective. In terms of where I am and where I have been, I am average, but to where I’m not and where I haven’t I am an other. My college experience has taught me many, many lessons. What we learn in the classroom is important, but what we learn outside of the classroom is just as, possibly more, valuable. In my case, I was able to escape a bubble, which altered my entire way of thinking. It has changed my perspective on perspective, if you will.

In one of our readings, titled “Unemployed Black Woman Pretends to be White, Job Offers Suddenly Skyrocket”, a woman does just that. An African American woman take the identity of a white female when applying for jobs, after being unsuccessful applying as herself, and finds that her job offers increase dramatically. Although this conveys a powerful message suggesting the deep-rooted issues within our society, I thought it offered a different insight. This example showed me how those who are privileged commonly are unknowingly. This does not only have to be the case with race, but with socioeconomic status, genetics, gender, etc. Those who are born the way that they are do not know anything different from exactly that. I feel a personal connection with this. Attending a high school where pursuing a college education is more than common; I am able to see how blind we can be to our privileges without knowing. It wasn’t until I pursued a different experience that I was able to see what made me different from other people. I now see life from a different perspective and for the better. The concept of being “average” only holds meaning within your realm of experience. Who I am and how I perceive others and myself has changed due to this significant experience.

My story has been impacted in other important ways. The person I am hasn’t been shaped by merely one major experience, but more so by experiencing one thing over a period of time; my family. I was always daddy’s little girl. I can vividly remember as a very young girl sitting on my dad’s shoulders, feeling like I could touch the sky. In reality I was only about 6 feet 5 inches in the air, but at that age it felt like I could see the world. I always insisted on my dad picking me up and holding me wherever we went, to me that was the safest place in the world. On our family beach vacations I was absolutely terrified of sharks, which kept me from ever going into the ocean. But only when my dad put me on a small raft and took me out through the waves did I feel completely at ease. In fact, those are some of my fondest childhood memories. Although it may be very common for young girls to view their fathers this way, my dad has always been a symbol of strength and security for me. His height definitely contributed to this safeness I felt whenever I was with him, but he resembled that in a unique way that not all fathers do.

My dad has been a Columbus Police Officer for twenty-eight years. He graduated from the academy just after my oldest brother, Christopher, was born in 1988. For as long as my two brothers and I can remember my dad has put on his uniform and gone to work. We always admired that in a very special way. Most dad’s dress in their suit and tie in the morning to go to work, but ours got dressed at nine at night to go to his. By the time we were waking up in the morning to go to school he was coming back from a night on the job. It took me a long time to truly understand what my dad did for a living. When I was young I admired him the same way that all young kids admire policemen, firemen, soldier, etc. They wore a special uniform and had shiny badge, something which all children are drawn to. When you’re young you’re sheltered from the realities of what these jobs entailed, and the older I got, the more aware I became of what my dad faced on a daily basis.

Through the experience of my dad being a police officer, I gained a different perspective on the world than my friends did. Growing up my friends were free-spirited and adventurous. I played along with it, but I was always a bit more cautious. The older I got, the more cautious I was. I was painfully aware of the things that happened outside of our safe community. This has played a major role in the development of who I am. The things that my dad has experienced through his job have truly shaped my perceptions. Being the daughter of a police officer gives you a perspective on things that not everyone can see. Not only do I witness the hardships of life outside of my sheltered suburban area, but I also see how that affects the people who witness it. What my dad has seen experienced how I was raised. He was protective of me in an effort to shelter me from the bad things he saw. This forced me to be more cautious growing up than my peers.

Being more aware of the environment around me is a blessing and a curse. It may have kept me form experiences that I’d have been freer to otherwise, but it also may have saved me in other situations. Now that both of my brothers have grown up to be police officers also, I have a deeper appreciation for what they do. It is seldom known the risks that are made in their job and I have become more aware of it by observing this through my brothers. Although going through life scared is no way to live, I also believe that going through life completely sheltered is not a way to live either. Who I am and my strengths are because of who my family is.

Before writing this essay, I saw myself as ordinary. Through the process of writing this paper I have made important discoveries. Being a fairly average person is not a negative thing, but a blessing when put into perspective. It’s not about your appearance or where you’re from that makes an individual who they are, but how you perceive those things. Every individual is unique in their own way and everyone has their own story.


Works Cited

Ortiz Cofer, Judith. "The Story of My Body." Minding the Body; Women Writers on Body and   Soul: 299-313. Web. 29 Apr. 2014.

"Unemployed Black Woman Pretends to be White, Job Offers Suddenly Skyrocket." .            BizTechNews, 15 Nov. 2012. Web. 29 Apr. 2014. <http://www.techyville.com/2012/11/news/unemployed-black-woman-pretends-to-be-white-job-offers-suddenly-skyrocket/>.

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